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FluffyInDrag

is a slot machine of gay!
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On a nostalgic whim I logged into this account for the first time in a while. My feelings about my time in this community are very mixed. On the one hand, I was subjected to some really horrific bullying and general mistreatment for something as basic as being "annoying." On the other hand, I met a few really great people here. Not the least of whom is my partner Fanaidh-Balaichean who I've known for nearly 15 years now having originally become friends via the #devart chat. I'm still a baker, I work hard and make simple, beautiful things for people to eat with quite a lot of pride in my craft. For all the other ups and downs, I do love my work. Most of my internet socializing is done on Discord or Twitch these days, and I suppose my general behaviors around that haven't changed much.


I'm interested to see if anyone on here finds this journal, and in doing so maybe finds me elsewhere. I have encountered a few deviants in the wild over the years. ffleret, my old tabpwn buddy, is in some similar Twitch circles. Ho-ohLover was lovely to meet at AGDQ in 2019. I still consider haldron a friend, though we don't talk much and likely won't see each other in person again now that I'm no longer nearby.


And just as a side note... I've outlived several of the people who were awful to me. I suppose it kinda goes to show the spiel about people being nasty online because they're unhappy people has some truth to it. Every time I hear another one, I wish I could say that I'm the bigger person and feel sorry for them but I really am not. The garbage people that eventually drove me away from this community can burn. I don't have an ounce of sympathy for them, living or dead. I'm not even sorry for their families and friends, because as much as I'm sure it sucks for them it would have also sucked a lot for my family and friends if I'd done as I was so frequently told here and killed myself, something which was much closer to happening than maybe most knew. I'm not sorry. I'm alive, despite it all, and fuck it I'm pretty close to thriving. If I had a better way to rub it in the faces of all the people who did these things to me I would.

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i dont know who any of you people are anymore lul?
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1. How long have you been on DeviantArt?
   10+ years on this account, I had a previous account for about three years before that.

2. What does your username mean?
   I had a couple of things. First, my group of friends was very into Harry Potter and we had nicknamed ourselves after the Marauder generation characters, and referred to each other as our "animagus names" as did the characters in the books. Moony, Padfoot, Prongs, Wormtail, etc. My character was Lucius Malfoy, I very much looked the part being goth and having long pale blonde hair, but his animagus form, if he had one, was not shown in the books. I had (and still have) a tiny, white, cantankerous cat, so we took that to be the best equivalent, and called it Fluffy. I was known as Fluffy, in lieu of my name, for many years by most people other than my family. Later, I cosplayed Sesshoumaru from Inuyasha as a genderswap, his fangirl nickname is also Fluffy, and thus I was Fluffy... in drag. tl;dr?

3. Describe yourself in three words.
  Contrarian, loyal, WIP.

4. Are you left or right handed?
 
Yes.

5. What was your first deviation?
  
Probably some colored pencil sketch. I have stored or deleted most of my old work.

6. What is your favourite type of art to create?
  
Culinary, with a close second going to erotic freeform poetry.

7. If you could instantly master a different art style, what would it be?
  
I wish I was decent at sculpting.

8. What was your first favourite?
  
I believe it was some silly video by sqeezy .

9. What type of art do you tend to favourite the most?
  I don't think I'm partial to much of anything, "type" wise.

10. Who is your all-time favourite deviant artist?
  
I think I will always have a soft spot for OpalMist's work.

11. If you could meet anyone on DeviantArt in person, who would it be?
  
I think this one has to go to lovely Opalmist as well.

12. How has a fellow deviant impacted your life?
  
Throughout my time here I changed in many ways, profound ways. I am not one to have many friends, but those I have are people I treasure and among the things I value most about them is that they understand that I DO change, despite my stubborn demeanor, and that I care very much about what is right. They support me in that and challenge me to do better, willing to go toe to toe with me when needed. For that, lovely OpalMist, haldron, isthisthingstillon, and Rach-air-muin have been wonderful and I appreciate having known them.

13. What are your preferred tools to create art?
  
Flour, sugar, eggs, dye... any old pencil and paper will do though.

14. What is the most inspirational place for you to create art?
  
I take my privacy seriously and carefully build what amounts to my nest to suit what I need to feel comfortable. It is where I do pretty much everything, including much of my art. That said, there is also a special place in my heart and an inspiration drawn from my favorite swimming hole near the house my mom grew up in, up in the Humboldt Redwoods. You can feel the history, human and otherwise, there in a way that museums and photos cannot capture.

15. What is your favourite DeviantArt memory?
  
I really loved getting to meet so many deviants at the 10th birthday bash, but I think it really comes down to the quieter moments of private conversations and sharing with people I met here and found unexpected understanding and friendship with. Those many, many hours and years of coming to the chats every day, like sitting at the most chaotic lunch table of the most badly-behaved school cafeteria, and reveling in the comings and goings of so many kinds of different people. It taught me a lot about the world in a way I think few get to experience.
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well

1 min read
Now with both of the apparently incompetent staff members gone who were in charge of the help desk throughout my harassment in the chats, do you think someone will finally address the ticket that has been sitting in someone's mail for over a year?
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It's been a trip, dA. 10 years. You've changed, I've changed.
It looks like it's about time for us to go our separate ways.

I've been mostly absent for the past several months. Moving around, graduating, a new career in the works.

Real life has kept me busy.

I had hoped, perhaps too optimistically, that the bonds I had made here would persist beyond my time with dA into adulthood when I would have moved onto bigger and better things but by and large that has not been the case. I'm not sorry for that, when I have visited back here I don't feel like I've been missing it. I miss the idea of it, and what it meant to me before, but whatever that was simply isn't anymore.

I've stored my gallery for now, maybe I will bring it back out sometime. I will probably not deactivate the account.

For those who might ask, no, my ticket detailing the harassment issue I dealt with has NOT been addressed and is still sitting in someone's inbox even after having lengthy discussion with the staff in charge of it. As was the case for the rest of the debacle, it's apparently just not worth the trouble of dealing with so it's being ignored in hopes that it will go away. In a sense I suppose it worked, 9 months since the ticket was put in and 3 years since the issue began. Even if dA never did diddly to help me out, at least life has stepped in and given me other things to do.

My internet presence continues elsewhere when I have the time. I will not be checking this account often so if contact with me is for whatever reason desired, my current info is thus:

Twitter: NarcisseExauce
Facebook: /fluffyindrag
Email: fluffy_in_drag@yahoo.com

Suck a big one, you skanks. :heart:
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